It's the third time this week he hasn't napped and yet he stayed up as late tonight as he normally would. You put him in his crib and he plays quietly until drifting to sleep. Peace is yours.
You can work on that thing- that project you've been meaning to work on. You're making progress. Finally.
Then he cries.
It's been less than an hour since you put him down. Now he's crying.
You wait because maybe he'll go back to sleep. Then you wait just one more minute to be sure.
Yes, he needs you.
You go to him slightly agitated because you can't seem to get a break today. You remind yourself he doesn't mean to mess up your day. He needs... something. Maybe to know it's okay.
So you hold him. Rock him back and forth, back and forth. Sing "lullaby and goodnight, in the sky stars are bright."
You think about this time where you could be finishing your project. You could be doing any one of the hundred things on your to do list. There are so many things to be done.
Then you realize this is the important stuff. All that other stuff... you can do that later. You can't do this later. You can't get this back.
You breathe in deep. Relax your grip while holding him snug. You sing quieter, closer to his face.
You trace the back curve of his ear, so soft that, like a flower petal, you can barely feel it at all.
These days it's so rare you get to hold him while he's sleeps. Remember what it was like. Remember what it is like. Right now.
You get to have this moment. Drink it in. Because some day he'll be too big, too smart, too independent for this.
But right now he is calm and so are you.
This is living wonderstruck. Soaking up the present. Moving from frustration to contentment. Having the power to choose how you feel. Choosing to be present, fully present in the glory and grace of this moment.
What moment will you transform today?
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I type my email address into the box and click. Another screen pops up: “Confirm your humanity.” I check a box and it is done. Humanity ...