Sunday, April 17, 2016

Stripped

A new chapter of my life is unfolding. It has been for quite a while now. It began with an uncoupling and a new home in a new town. With that came the desire for new friendships, and the question of where a woman in her late 30s finds other women to befriend.

The all-consuming question has been this: Who am I now? Now that I have no one to worry about but myself and my son. How do I spend my time? How do I keep us physically, emotionally, and financially secure? What does this life look like?

As I peel back layers and pare down possessions, I consider carefully what is me? What is me in this moment? What is part of the enduring me?

This is a time of exploration, and I the reluctant explorer.

I have lost some things: a live-in partner, a former book club, security, and predictability.

Then there is the new. I have become a Hospice volunteer. I have become a Reiki Master/Teacher. I have joined a local book club. I have started a new full-time job—my first in 6 years. I have been embraced by a church with abundant energy, where I am a minority. So much love and goodness.

The changes are sweeping—broad strokes that clear and clear until I am bare. From this bareness, this stripped-down-ness, my life continues on its new path.

So, if you’ve wondered why my words have been few, it is because I am still clearing. Still stripping to find the core of me. The truth that is me and no one else.

With that, I am also stripping this website. I am taking it down to its most basic form: a simple blog. I am removing offerings and “fluff.” I make no promises for frequency of posts. I simply know that, right now, I need to continue peeling back the layers.

Sweep. Peel. Strip. Clear.

Breathe.