A new chapter of my life is unfolding. It has been for quite a while now. It began with an uncoupling and a new home in a new town. With that came the desire for new friendships, and the question of where a woman in her late 30s finds other women to befriend.
The all-consuming question has been this: Who am I now? Now that I have no one to worry about but myself and my son. How do I spend my time? How do I keep us physically, emotionally, and financially secure? What does this life look like?
As I peel back layers and pare down possessions, I consider carefully what is me? What is me in this moment? What is part of the enduring me?
This is a time of exploration, and I the reluctant explorer.
I have lost some things: a live-in partner, a former book club, security, and predictability.
Then there is the new. I have become a Hospice volunteer. I have become a Reiki Master/Teacher. I have joined a local book club. I have started a new full-time job—my first in 6 years. I have been embraced by a church with abundant energy, where I am a minority. So much love and goodness.
The changes are sweeping—broad strokes that clear and clear until I am bare. From this bareness, this stripped-down-ness, my life continues on its new path.
So, if you’ve wondered why my words have been few, it is because I am still clearing. Still stripping to find the core of me. The truth that is me and no one else.
With that, I am also stripping this website. I am taking it down to its most basic form: a simple blog. I am removing offerings and “fluff.” I make no promises for frequency of posts. I simply know that, right now, I need to continue peeling back the layers.
Sweep. Peel. Strip. Clear.
Breathe.
The all-consuming question has been this: Who am I now? Now that I have no one to worry about but myself and my son. How do I spend my time? How do I keep us physically, emotionally, and financially secure? What does this life look like?
As I peel back layers and pare down possessions, I consider carefully what is me? What is me in this moment? What is part of the enduring me?
This is a time of exploration, and I the reluctant explorer.
I have lost some things: a live-in partner, a former book club, security, and predictability.
Then there is the new. I have become a Hospice volunteer. I have become a Reiki Master/Teacher. I have joined a local book club. I have started a new full-time job—my first in 6 years. I have been embraced by a church with abundant energy, where I am a minority. So much love and goodness.
The changes are sweeping—broad strokes that clear and clear until I am bare. From this bareness, this stripped-down-ness, my life continues on its new path.
So, if you’ve wondered why my words have been few, it is because I am still clearing. Still stripping to find the core of me. The truth that is me and no one else.
With that, I am also stripping this website. I am taking it down to its most basic form: a simple blog. I am removing offerings and “fluff.” I make no promises for frequency of posts. I simply know that, right now, I need to continue peeling back the layers.
Sweep. Peel. Strip. Clear.
Breathe.
This is beautiful. You know I am cheering you on as you continue to move forward. Thank you for sharing so much of you life with us.
ReplyDeleteYou my dear friend are a survivor! You are a beautiful person inside and out. Please know you are loved by so many!
ReplyDeleteLinda
I wish you well in your journey. I have often asked myself could I do it if I had to? You are an inspiration. A good soul. A motivator. Good things will come to you because you deserve them. Stay strong and march on.
ReplyDeleteGiant hugs coming from your old friends.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about the changes you're going through. You are stronger than you think you are and you'll weather this and the next challenge and the next one and the one after that.
ReplyDeleteYour posts have been amazing! Keep on doing what you have been doing. The process is working!
ReplyDelete